About Face

Current mood:frustrated

Now I can see why God brought me that wonderful experience over the weekend at work. It was to make up for days like this that come along that make one ask if nursing is a survivable thing. Whether the spirit can endure days like this where human beings can be so mean and hurtful that you wonder what gets into people to make them act in such a hateful manner and hurt peoples feelings. And, Im not talking about just patients. Families can often times be just as mean, only with patients its more understandable because they are hurt, sick, frustrated, sleep deprived. Those things I can grin and bear with because I know its origins. However,  I find it funny that I was literally flying around in the stratosphere after my amazing weekend with a patient/family I took care of, to being down here so low crashin back down to earth. I know. This is the reality of nursing. It is what it is. I love what I do, love making even the teeniest difference in someones health and how they live and recover after illness or through it…..just, days like this, when people are so hateful or mean, it hurts the spirit, hurts my heart. Because we work so hard, try so hard, go through so much for our patients to give them the best. At least I do. I need to learn not to take the meanies not so personally–that is the…..what should I say….Yes, that is the rookie in me. The rookie nurse learning how to live through days like this and wake up next time eager to go back and put her spirit back out there to help another feel better…………..Ill just pray on this, because I know God was showing me some things today but I need some time to think of just what the lessons were today. Im too exhausted just now to figure them out…..Sorry God. I sat with my family this evening after Jamie dropped me at home on the way to hers…….I had wine, rested in the big recliner, and just enjoyed the peace of my surroundings. Being with my family. The quiet of the environment compared to where I had just come from. Its ok to let go now. Jamie says dont take it home……….Havent learned that one yet.